I'm not sure anyone ever looks at this anymore since I've lagged so completely on updating recently.
I've been struck the last couple of days, today perhaps the hardest, about how much I hate living in America sometimes. I know, I know. I should count my blessings that I live in a country where I can openly criticize and such. But I don't know...something about the land of the credit cards and home of the materialistic doesn't seem so appealing to me.
I hate walking into a store to see all the abundance that everyone has and wants more of. I'm tired of seeing women smaller than me driving an SUV the size of a motor home in order to tote around all of ONE 6-month old child. I mean...if you have a large family and need the room, that's one thing. But if you just have excess money to throw around on luxery and 12 miles to the gallon, then have a heart and think about a Jamaican once in a while.
I hate how these "Christians" all around don't look much like a "peculiar people." I'm sick of how they fit in.
And I'm sick of how I fall right into it. And I wonder if it's a bad thing to feel guilty for buying new maternity clothes when I checked the consignment store first, but found they had no shorts or t-shirts. I don't think it's a bad thing. Rather, I think it's a bad thing to buy stuff and never wonder if you really need it.
So, the son of man had no where to lay his head, but we are so comfortable with our homes that we never leave them to serve. I'm so tired of living in my mid-west America, middle class neighborhood where we care about how green the lawn is and my neighbors have a new car every 6 months. (I swear it's like clockwork.)
I read a book called The Last of Her Kind this week. It was...okay. It passed the time, you know. It was a little bit boring...didn't have much of a plot, but it made me envious. Despite the drugs and free sex that I could do without, I was jealous of the nomadic life they lived...or some of them did anyway. Maybe it was romanticized...probably it was. But I wish for once I could live up to my principles.
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
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i still read your blog and am glad you updated it dude!
ReplyDeletei feel the same way most the time. it's tough; i don't think Christians should have separations in the way they act in different parts of their lives, like work, family, church, friends, activities. you should be the same person everywhere. it's just that in Christianity or Americanized Christianity or whatever, it seems like there are certain things you CAN say, and certain things that are CONTROVERSIAL, and then there's certain things that are WRONG to talk about. Which is dumb.
i was running last night with a group and the subject of Tom Cruise came up; these women my age or around my age are bantering back and forth about why Tom Cruise has acted strangely, why he was let go from Paramount, and finally i turn around and am like, "Well, let's start with he's in a CULT!" and then this other girl's like, "well you can say any sort of religion is a cult" so you know me and i couldn't let that one go so i reply, "not really...if one were to actually study each religion, you could see whether it was a cult or not pretty easily." and then of course they changed the subject. God forbid that we would talk about anything serious in this nation anymore with people we don't really know very well!
Irritating. it's like on the one hand, Christians have their own language, and on the other hand, non-Christians expect that Christians should stfu about everything. Whatever.
so that's my biggest ish.